This is a long shot I know but even just the slightest chance is worth it.
I was over at Theater X getting a blow-job (It was a guy yes, but I'm not gay) when you pulled in.
I was in the car parked in the dark corner. I know you saw me because you said to your friend, "holy shit those pillow biters are in that car going at it".
Plus the public police report also mentions this.
You wanted a dildo gag toy for your sisters bachelorette party. How original!
When you looked at me my heart leapt, I forgot all about the hairy truck driver in my lap. We made a connection as you crossed the parking lot.
I had to have you. Your face was so sexy I could eat it.
You were clearly upset and frantic when I emerged from the car. I tried to calm you but you only increased your spasms.
Apparently in my rush to greet you I forgot to put the ole shovel back in the shed properly.
I mean, who hasn't forgotten to zip up after a hurried rendezvous in a car or by a dumpster in a dimly lit alley? Can I get an amen?
Been there and have the stained t-shirt to prove it!
I guess the responding officer was a rookie because when I told him not to worry, that all I had been ingesting of late was some harmless bath salts, he flipped out.
Geesh, you would have thought I told him I was a zombie or something. Fuck me running.
Which is what I did. I ran.
Thankfully the truck driver took off running as well.
For what reasons, only god knows but as they say...you don't have to outrun the bear, you just have to outrun the other guy.
So my sweet dildo hunting homophobe...lets grab a bite to eat sometime.
Sooner than later as I'm famished.
N.
I was over at Theater X getting a blow-job (It was a guy yes, but I'm not gay) when you pulled in.
I was in the car parked in the dark corner. I know you saw me because you said to your friend, "holy shit those pillow biters are in that car going at it".
Plus the public police report also mentions this.
You wanted a dildo gag toy for your sisters bachelorette party. How original!
When you looked at me my heart leapt, I forgot all about the hairy truck driver in my lap. We made a connection as you crossed the parking lot.
I had to have you. Your face was so sexy I could eat it.
You were clearly upset and frantic when I emerged from the car. I tried to calm you but you only increased your spasms.
Apparently in my rush to greet you I forgot to put the ole shovel back in the shed properly.
I mean, who hasn't forgotten to zip up after a hurried rendezvous in a car or by a dumpster in a dimly lit alley? Can I get an amen?
Been there and have the stained t-shirt to prove it!
I guess the responding officer was a rookie because when I told him not to worry, that all I had been ingesting of late was some harmless bath salts, he flipped out.
Geesh, you would have thought I told him I was a zombie or something. Fuck me running.
Which is what I did. I ran.
Thankfully the truck driver took off running as well.
For what reasons, only god knows but as they say...you don't have to outrun the bear, you just have to outrun the other guy.
So my sweet dildo hunting homophobe...lets grab a bite to eat sometime.
Sooner than later as I'm famished.
N.
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