Nemesis (Pan the horizon)

Nemesis (Pan the horizon, in vain)

Wake up Neo...The greatest enemy will hide in the place you least expect.

I.

The Tarc bus shooting has no relation to the McCarthy drug ring takedown. Just look away. Don’t notice. Click something else. Miss that connection.

Described as respectful and soft-spoken, Michael A. McCarthy Jr. lived quietly with his girlfriend and children in a $353,000 home on a one-acre plot in a Spencer County subdivision.Thomas Gorman, the DEA’s assistant special agent in charge for Louisville, said McCarthy didn’t flaunt his wealth and ran a disciplined operation. - CJ’s Andrew Wolfson 

II.

Even though that storm came in May, the fallout from this has taken some time. Lets not even mention the news agencies who sat on the story at the behest of its masters. 

 Pawns only really draw attacking power from the stronger pieces behind them. Position. Power. Time.

 In Chess, time is the factor most overlooked. What? You thought the drug trade would cease now? White people are so quaint. The gods of your capitalist religion are just moving pieces. Game on.

Louisville attorney Frank Mascagni III represents the alleged ring leader and says he doesn't fit the profile of someone who is the head of a drug cartel. - again, CJ’s Andrew Wolfson

That’s because he isn’t. Check but never mate. There is always a bigger fish. Lets call him Pan. I’d wish them luck catching him but they don’t want to catch him. Attorney Frank is known as “the ego” in my circles.

III.

We all die though. Echo did. Now is not the time to fear. That comes later.

That is where you find out who you are though. In the thick of it as death looms. Against nemesis you will be brought. The outcome? Who knows. Such things are rarely if ever up to me. If you win he will only come after you again, and again and again.

   We can only do. Now. What is in front of us. Your plans, beliefs, hopes really don’t matter if you don’t act on them in the now. 

   Not sure what to believe in anymore? I know, I know, so many Netflix titles...so little time. Easier just to “like” on Facebook and give us all some profound quote. Like is now a verb. An action. 

Instead. Just once. 

Try doing the next right thing. Wether you like it or not. Then repeat. Start small. 

IV.

Your still here reading? Than it was meant for you. You have missed the connection and the matrix still has you. Oh, I’m well aware that any moment now the door will kick in and the REAL movie (with appropriate theme song) that is your life will begin in earnest. And you will show me by golly. Weeks fly by yet days take forever. 

Your greatest enemy hid very well. No, not in the TARC bus, not in the shooter, not in the bigger bloody coup of bishops and knights in the drug cartels nor their well paid lawyers. Not even in conspiracies that involve high powers and principalities. Yes god dammit there is always a bigger fish but these are pawns.

All those places one would EXPECT to find nemesis. Think harder.

V.

Except thinking is what got you here. In fact it’s your thinking that is now in doubt. Under suspicion. Are you seated? The brain’s thinking can’t-- won’t conceive of this because it is your brain. 

No con game could be this big? Could it? The last place you would ever look...

Too busy not flaunting its brainy wealth and running a disciplined operation. Nemesis is you.

VI.

...And your picking up your phone to call your attorney Frank the “ego” even now.

N.

Echo fading...(Nemesis rising)

In case you didn’t know, Echo is my soul mate. She was the one. Just picking up her scent enthralls me. I can be seven ways beyond angry at her. Lord knows she pushes my buttons. But I cannot stop loving her. I gave up trying to understand her a long time ago. The best females are impossible to figure out. She is eternity wrapped in tan skin and dark hair. She snorts a little when she laughs a lot.

When the doctors told Echo that her insides were rocky ground were my seed could find no fertile ground, she was devastated. Got to be were she barely climbed out of bed. I could not console the woman who had saved my life. Colors faded and dust accumulated. 

My record prevented adoption and money kept most other options distant. The days drug on.

In my desperation I turned to someone I didn’t fully understand. The strong man. The wicked one. Boss. The overlord Pan. 

I had dealt with Pan before in my lawless youth. Survived to tell the tale and I figured that if I could just fix the problem, my Echo would be ok. For that I needed money and Pan could help me score it fast.

What I did not foresee was that Pan would desire my Echo, betray me and leave me for dead. Losing Echo to Pan was the bitter payment I received. 

Focused on myself, worried about me and seeing Echo only through my own reflection, I lost her. Thinking I was saving her I was sending her away.

Make no mistake, I still hunt the goat fucker Pan. I struck him down once already. Maybe I’ll tell some of those sordid tales one day, Missed encounters where I almost finished off the godlike avenger. That is, if we don’t kill each other first. 

Needless to say, Echo disapproved of my turning to illegal activities. I know now, too late, that she really only wanted my unconditional love. More than bearing me offspring, more than money, more than all the instruments I bought her.

Seems whenever I would win her back, something would cause me to lose her yet again. Always the wealthy and beautiful Nemesis in the shadows. 

You see, Pan unleashed the wench Nemesis to stalk my every step. She is a vengeful bitch. Never underestimate her. I have the scars to prove it. Sometimes even pretending to be Echo to lure me in. 

I trudge on. Seeing her everywhere but she is nowhere. She is the only true love I have ever known. My echo.

N.